PORTSMOUTH, OH – Oh, so much complaining, boohooing, and nitpicking by the Lefty liberals in Florida. Zip your lips already. My ears are exploding with your rowdy rhetoric. Stop playing the victimization game with beseeching and screeching – enough already.
“Pressure will squeeze whining out of losers and winning out of achievers.” –Orrin Woodward
Charlie Crist, President of the Whiners R US Club
A 2022 article in People outlined Florida Democratic gubernatorial nominee Charlie Crist’s political history in a nutshell.
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Crist previously served in Florida’s state Senate and as the state’s attorney general and education commissioner. His current campaign marks Crist’s third run for Florida governor. His first, as a Republican, was successful, and he served as governor from 2007 to 2011. He became an independent in 2010, launching an unsuccessful bid for U.S. Senate and ultimately losing to Marco Rubio. In 2012, Crist officially joined the Democratic Party and launched another bid for governor in 2014. He lost to Republican Rick Scott, but in 2016 was elected to the U.S. House of Representatives. Crist will next face off against Gov. DeSantis, a Republican, in November.
Three strikes and you’re out. Will Crist give up when he loses during the next election? Or will he return in four years with more whining? Charlie Brown, don’t go away mad, just go away.
“I much prefer whining to counting my blessings.” –Mary Ann Shaffer
While recently comparing Gov. DeSantis to Satan and himself to Christ, Crist is now calling upon his Christian faith in an ad that wallops his fellow running mate – so much for loving thy neighbor as thyself.
“My faith teaches me that we’re all children of God,” Crist says. “That whoever oppresses a poor man insults his maker, but he who is generous to the needy honors him. That is lost on Ron DeSantis.”
Crist continues with the voiceover, “For him, it’s always putting politics over people’s lives. Lying to migrant children to lure them onto a plane to God knows where.”
“Mocking their fight for freedom, it makes me sick,” Crist says. “But not surprising, because that’s who he is.”
The ad oozes with drama and hyperbole. When your message is erroneous, you attack the messenger – an age-old tactic of politician propaganda experts. Wallowing in the mud of dirty politics is not endearing to sensible citizens.
“Thank you for calling customer service. If you’re calm and rational, press 1. If you’re a whiner, press 2. If you’re a hot head, press 3.” –Randy Glasbergen
What stunt will Crist pull next? Will he carry a massive wooden cross on his back and track across the sunshine state while vilifying his Christian opponent?
“When problems arise, you will usually find two types of people: whiners and winners. Whiners obstruct progress; they spend hours complaining about this point or that, without offering positive solutions. Winners acknowledge the existence of the problem, but they try to offer practical ideas that can help resolve the matter in a manner that is satisfactory to both parties.” –George Foreman